


Never Again

by LittleAbberentWriter



Series: Never Again [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Drama, Drama & Romance, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Levi Ackerman - Freeform, Porn With Plot, Reader-Insert, Romance, Self-Insert, Titans
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-15
Updated: 2017-04-13
Packaged: 2018-09-08 17:51:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8855131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleAbberentWriter/pseuds/LittleAbberentWriter
Summary: After too much pain from too many losses you have become insensitive to everyone around you, or at least you think. However deep down in your scarred heart you still care deeply for those around you, but never dare admit it. It's not until one sudden and irrational sexual rendezvous with a certain corporal do these buried feelings come to surface.





	1. Chapter 1

To some, surviving is like winning. Of course it does seem the better option against dying, but when you really think hard you come to realize surviving is a burden. One of the heaviest burdens anyone has to carry. Not only do you have to live on when so many of your friends, family, and comrades have suffered the inevitable, but you have to live on alone. In solitude. Constantly being reminded that you lived and they didn't. This is a weight you've carried by yourself for a very long time. This weight has forced you to become strong, but it took away your ability to feel. You can't remember the last time you genuinely laughed or smiled and quite frankly you didn't want to. Remembering hurt too much. Bringing back those memories would only cause you to become weak. You couldn't have that. After all, you had a squad full of rambunctious youngsters to constantly watch over. Well, more like oversized 6 year olds. Pushing all other thoughts aside you waked over to your squad and began training.

 

"Come on, what are you? A pack of turtles? Run faster!" You shouted to your squad, who were each one by one slowing down. "Come on squad leader (f/n)! We've been running for hours! Can't we take a break?" Wheezed Alice. She was the youngest and the smallest in your squad, but she was by no means weak. "I swear, if I hear one more complaint out of any of you I will have you all run till sunset!" You heard a few grumbles and mumbled curses but after that no one said anything. Your squad was one of the best but made up of new adults, fresh from their teenage years. The eldest being Bruce Leverre at 24 years old. He was very big for his age, being roughly 6'4. He had deep brown hair, shaved into a buzz cut and blue eyes so pale they almost looked white. The second eldest was Lissa Brooks, 22 years old. She was 5'6, had short red hair, and deep green eyes. Next was Lucas Schmidt, 20 years old. A tall lanky boy around 6'0, shaggy dirty blond hair and topaz eyes. Lastly there was Alice Darcy, 19 years old. A small girl only standing at 5'3 with long black hair and shining mint eyes. Then there was you. (F/n) (L/n), 28 years old. You were extremely small only standing at 4'9, maybe 5'0 on a good day. Despite your size you were one of the best soldiers in the Recon Corps. Not only were you an amazing soldier but you were very popular with the men. Winning over any one with your long (h/c) hair and (e/c) orbs. Not to mention you had a strong, resilient, and rather lovely figure. 

 

Finally you decided to put the torture to an end and signalled for your squad to stop. Letting out a small huff you turned to look at your squad. Not a single one was standing, instead they were all lying together in one big heap. You sighed and walked over to the mess. "Oi, idiots. If you all aren't up within the next five seconds I will have all of you start running again." You said seriously. Not even a second after those words left your mouth they were up. You told them to go wash up before dinner because they smelt worse than shit, which they happily agreed to do. After they left you sat down taking a sip of water from your canteen. 'They seemed to be a lot more tired than usual today. I will have to make note to ask them why tomorrow.' You thought. You then decided it would be best to wash yourself up before dinner as well. You barley took three steps before walking into something hard, sending you butt first to the ground. You waited for the impact but it never came, instead you felt a strong hand on your wrist pulling you back up. Looking up to see your saviour, you met the cold eyes of none other than Lance Corporal Levi.

 

Quickly regaining your composure you stood straight and saluted. "My apologies, sir." You said looking him dead in the eyes. "Tch, just watch where you're going next time." And with that he walked away. 'Yeah, watch where I'm going.' You thought sarcastically. It's not that you disliked the corporal, but you didn't have a reason to like him either. You only ever speak to him when you're delivering papers, and that barley counts as a conversation. He also doesn't look like a person who would want to hold a conversation with anybody, so you didn't take his lack of conversation to heart. But then again you really didn't care. You didn't like conversing much yourself. Unless it's necessary to speak, you usually keep quiet. You weren't shy by any means, but you figured why waste breath on people who were just going to leave or die eventually. 

 

Finally you arrived to your room, a bit later than you would have liked but you have to stop two cadets getting into a full on brawl. "Stupid kids." You thought out loud, entering your room. Sighing you striped down, folded your clothes neatly and entered your bathroom. Being a higher up had its perks, one of them being you had your own personal bathroom. You entered the steaming shower and proceeded to wash the sweat from your body, humming softly to yourself. Your humming was silenced when you heard the click of a door being opened and closed again. 'Probably just a stupid cadet trying to pull a prank.' you thought exiting the shower to go investigate. Stepping out of the bathroom in nothing but a white towel that barley covered your body, you saw the corporal sitting in your chair. You saw his cold eyes widen for a second before quickly regaining his stoic expression. You wondered what caused such an expression until it hit you. You were in nothing but a small, soaking wet towel. "If I may ask, why are you in my room sir?" You asked, almost sounding bored. He simply rolled his eyes and looked away. 'Is he blushing?' You wondered. 'Of course he's not blushing you idiot, why would he?' You thought. Must have just been a trick of the light. 

 

Still refusing to meet your gaze he said in his same old monotone voice, "Shitty Glasses made me come here to tell you that there is a meeting in twenty minutes for all the higher ups." Ah good old Hanji, pushing everyone to near insanity with that titan talk of hers. Only god knows why she loves those disgusting things so much. You turned away from Levi to get a clean uniform from your closet. You turned your head to look at the corporal from over your shoulder. "Is that all, sir?" You questioned. "Yes, that is all." He said heading to the door. "Oh and one more thing." You turned fully to look at him, wondering what else he had to say. "You should really remember to lock your door before showering." And with that he shut the door and left. 'Ahh, so that's how he got in.' You thought slipping on a crisp white shirt. 

 

Once you were completely dressed in a clean uniform you went over to your mirror to braid your hair. After you finished preparing yourself you looked at the time. You still had ten minutes. 'Well I can go put my dirty laundry away before I go.' While picking up the dirty uniform you noticed that your white panties were missing. 'Huh, I could've sworn I put it here.' Shrugging of the thought, you put away the dirty laundry to wash later. You decided it was time to go, after all you didn't want to be late. This time before you left you made sure to lock your door. After making sure it was locked tight, you made your way to the meeting.


	2. The Deal

Despite walking as slow as you possibly could you still made it to the meeting room five minutes early. It was, after all, only a three minute walk from you room to here. 'Well maybe if we all start earlier we can finish in time for dinner.' You thought hopefully. Sometimes these meetings went on long past dinner time. You swung the door open to reveal Erwin, Hanji and a few other squad and team leaders. Looking around you noticed a certain someone was missing. It was the corporal. "Ah, (f/n)! You're here!" A very excited Hanji squealed. "Yes I am, but where is the corporal? He's usually one of the first to arrive." Hanji shrugged her shoulders. "I dunno where shorty is." There was a short silence before Hanji piped up again. "Oh! Maybe you could go to his room and see what he's up to (f/n)!" You were taken aback by this sudden statement. "Why the hell do I have to?" Hanji looked over to you with a mischievous grin. She had always wanted you to get together with Levi, constantly saying things about 'Rivaille babies'. "Well because me and Erwin have some documents to prepare before we can officially start." She stated, still grinning. You let out a sigh. You had no choice, there was no way you could get out of it. Especially with Hanji. "Fine, whatever. I'll be right back." And with a quick turn of your heel, you exited the room.

 

Making one final turn down the hall, you stopped in front of Levi's door. You were about to knock when you noticed the door was slightly ajar. Moving to push it open you stopped when you heard a long hoarse moan. Your whole body froze. You wanted to believe Levi was hurt, but the following moans you heard shortly after told you otherwise. This was bad. You should just turn around and leave. Tell the others he was busy. But against your better judgement you quietly pushed the door open, not a lot, but just enough to try and see the corporal. Sure enough you saw him, and what a sight it was. There he sat on a wooden chair with his pants around his ankles, stroking himself with a large piece of white fabric. At first you mistook it to be his cravat, but upon further inspection you saw what it really was. It was your undershirt that had gone missing. You felt you face heat up. You were sure you looked like a tomato right now, but your face wasn't the only thing that was growing hot. You squeezed your legs together. Were you actually getting turned on by watching your superior jerk of with your shirt? You squeezed your legs tighter as the need for touch became worse. You mind was telling you to look away, to leave. But something held you there in place, eyes locked onto the corporal. 

 

As if your mind had been completely thrown from your body, you felt your hand slipping lower and lower to rub the spot that was begging for attention. This had to be an all time low for you. Rubbing yourself through your pants while watching him do such lewd things, really? You felt so dirty, but that only fuelled the fire more. You felt yourself getting close, but just before you hit your high, you stumbled, banging you knee against the door. Swinging it wide open. Your eyes met the widened ones of Levi, still clouded over with lust. You didn't know what to do so you just stood there with your hand between your legs and a very reddened face.

 

"(F/n)."

 

"Yes sir?" 

 

"Come here." 

 

You stood there frozen for a second before making you way over to the still half naked corporal. "Get on your knees, now." Without thinking, you complied, stuck in a trance. "Now suck." The corporal demanded, his voice still hoarse. You obeyed, gingerly licking the tip before taking in his full length. As you bobbed your head up and down you moved a hand down to undo your pants, the need for contact became desperate. It seemed to turn Levi on even more when he noticed your actions.

 

This was just too much. The pleasure was just too overwhelming. You were getting close and you could tell Levi was to, from the way his hips started buckling to meet the back of your throat. "Ahh, f-fuck (f/n). I'm close." He said through ragged breaths. The only response from you were your muffled moans. Just as you came Levi did to, grabbing as much of your (h/c) locks he could and pushing your head down so far that your lips touched the base of his manhood. You felt his thick cum at the back of your throat so you had no other choice than to swallow. Slowly removing your mouth, you made sure to get all of the cum left over. The two of you sat there in silence for awhile, trying to catch your breath heavy breaths. Once you had both come down from your highs you looked at each other. Only then did the fact of what you just did sink in. Levi also seemed to realize this, his expression changing from tired to shocked and alarmed. You didn't know he could make such faces. "I uh h-have to go now." You stuttered before abruptly standing up and quickly making you way to the door. You were just about to exit when you felt a strong hand tightly grasp your wrist. You turned to see Levi looking very serious. 

 

"We don't need to tell anybody about this."

 

"O-Of course, sir." 

 

You went to leave again but he pulled you back. 'What now, I just wanna leave.' He looked at you before speaking again. "But, if it is okay with you I would like to..ehrm.. Continue this regularly." You stood there letting the words register in your mind. "You mean like, be fuck buddies with you?" He was silent for a moment. "Well to put it blatantly, yes." It was a temping offer, you were growing tired of having to pleasure yourself. Why not have him do it for you? You turned to him with a mischievous grin. "I would love to." And with that you left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so dirty *.*


	3. A nightmare

You fumbled with the key to your room while trying to get in as quickly as you could. Once you managed to unlock it you swiftly entered and shut the door, locking it again. Needless to say you did not return to the meeting. As for Levi, you didn't know if he went or not. If he did you hoped he would at least come up with a decent excuse to why you were missing. Sighing, you removed your jacket and placed it on your chair. 'Great, now I have to shower again.' You thought, fuming to yourself. Entering your bathroom you started the shower, letting the steam rise and heat up the cold room. You removed your clothes and placed them on the nearby sink. As you were about to turn away your reflection in the mirror grabbed your attention. Your once light plump lips were now red and swollen, your eyes slightly red rimmed and hazy and your cheeks burnt a light crimson. Not to mention your hair was now completely loose from its braid, (h/c) strands sticking out messily, falling in every direction. You barley recognized yourself. Pulling your eyes away from your reflection, you entered the piping hot shower. You let out a small yelp as the scalding water first touched you skin, but you quickly adjusted to the sensation. Washing the sweat and 'other bodily fluids' off yourself, you began to think. 'Why did that just happen? I always thought the corporal liked that little ginger girl. Petra, her name was?' You thought about it for a few more moments before deciding that it was none of your business who Levi liked. Not that you cared anyway, you were just in it for the pleasure, not for love.

 

After exiting the shower, you put on a light night gown and prepared for bed. As you were laying out your uniform you noticed your white undershirt was missing. You were confused for a moment when you remembered where you saw it last. In Levi's hands, on his manhood. You brought your hand to your forehead and let out a frustrated sigh. 'That was the last god damned clean one I had.' You usually kept up with laundry but the past few days had been particularly busy and you just didn't have the time. You would just have to suffer through one day without an undershirt. How bad could it possibly be? Then something else occurred to you. 'He better wash the damn thing before he gives it back.' You thought, still annoyed. Blowing out the candle and crawling into bed, you finally let sweet sleep take over.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"(F/N), ELSIE, RUN!"

"PAPA!" Everything's a blur. All you can see is the horrified face of your father trying desperately to free himself from the heap of rubble that traps him. Tears well up in your eyes as you're pulled further away from him. You turn your head to face your mother, who is pulling you along with all her might. You could see the pain and fear in her eyes, tears falling rapidly. You turn your head back just in time to see a large mutilated hand pulling your father from the rubble. "NOOO!" You screamed at the top of your lungs. Your mother turned to look at what you screamed at. She quickly snapped her head forward again and started running faster. You however, could not look away. Your eyes were glued to your father and the monster that held his squirming form. The beast then used both hands to snap him clean in half and proceeded to put him in his mouth. You were too shocked to scream, you only stared at the thing. Blood dripped down its wide chin. It turned to face you, a wide grin plastered amongst its face. The next moment you were whipped around a corner, the thing disappearing from your sight. You looked to your mother who had stopped, trying desperately to catch her breath. She then turned to you and took your face into her petite hands. 

"(F/n), sweetie, it's okay it'll be fine don't worr-" 

Her words were cut off when she saw a large head peek around the corner. Trembling, she grabbed your hand and tried running but a rock caught under her foot, sending her to the ground with a sickening thud. 

"MAMA, MAMA GET UP, ITS COMING!" You screeched at your mother.

"GO WITHOUT ME, RUN, PLEASE!" She yelled back, chocking on a sob.

You only had backed up a few paces before the beast picked up you mother. She looked at you one last time before the beast slid her into its mouth. You turned to run but tripped over something hard. You turned and saw it was a dead solider slumped against the wall, or at least what was left of them. As the beast approached an idea popped into your head. It wasn't a good one but you were running on pure adrenaline. You hastily grabbed the deceased soldiers blades and went into a defensive stance. You don't know what came over you, all you knew was how badly you wanted to kill that thing. You swung a blade as it reached for you, cutting off one of its massive thumbs. You were about to swing again when it caught you with it's other hand. Bringing you up to its face, it gave you a light squeeze, causing you to scream out in pain. Deciding it was done playing with you, the thing moved to put you in its mouth. The smell of blood and rotting limbs made you want to hurl. You didn't want to die like this. Sliding down it you quickly stuck a blade onto the back of its throat. Using the other blade you started thrashing violently, desperate to free yourself. Relief flooded through you as you saw light peek through the hot flesh. The beast made a sound so horrifying it shook you to the bone, but that didn't stop you from tearing out more of its muscle. Finally, with one final strike, you were out. Falling rapidly to the ground you thought, 'At least I won't die in that horrible place.' You closed your eyes and awaited impact, but it never came. Instead you felt a pair of warm arms wrap around you. When you opened your eyes you were met with a man, his features hidden beneath a green cloak. "Thank you." You mumbled before you fell unconscious.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Fuck!" You yelled bolting upright. You were covered in a thin layer of sweat, breathing heavily. You brought a hand to your face, feeling your cheeks which were wet with tears. Why did you dream about that now? It's been so long since you last had this nightmare. You thought about getting a glass if water but decided against it. You assumed it to be around 5:00. You had to be up soon anyways, might as well get ready early. With that you grabbed a towel and headed to shower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3 is here! Poor reader-chan


	4. Unpredictable

You decided not to go to the dining hall for breakfast this morning, you were still too shaken to deal with anybody. So instead you used your little stove and made yourself some tea. You tried to do some paperwork, but your mind would keep wandering. Letting out a frustrated sigh you threw down your pen and pushed away the barley touched documents. You sat there for awhile before something dawned on you.

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me." You said exasperatedly, remembering you had training with your squad. 

Looking over at your clock you checked the time. It was 11:51 and training began at 12:00 sharp. If you didn't haul ass to the training grounds as fast as possible you will have broken your number one rule. Never be late. Springing out of your chair you quickly checked your appearance, making sure you didn't look like complete shit, and ran out the door slamming it shut.

 

Sprinting down the hallway you ignored the curious looks everyone gave you. You started running even faster when you heard a very loud and confused Hanji calling out your name. 'I don't have the time or patience to deal with her.' You thought, Turing a corner and disappearing from her sight.

"Huh? Where is she off to in such a hurry?" Hanji said, a little disappointment residing in her voice.

She was slightly worried about you. First you didn't return to the meeting last night, then you didn't show up for breakfast and now you are running by looking like death itself. She was about to leave when she spotted Levi.

"Heey Shorty!" Levi tensed at the not so loved nickname.

"What the hell do you want Hanji." Levi said, more than a little annoyed. 

"Well I was wondering if you knew if (f/n) was okay, I mean she didn't show for breakfast today and I just saw her run by looking horrible." 

Levi paused for a moment. "I have no idea why, I wouldn't know such things. Now leave me be." He said with the same bored expression, but his voice had slightly faltered.

"Are you sur-." Hanji didn't finish her sentence, noticing that she was talking to thin air. 'Weird.' Was all she thought before skipping away.

Your squad was patiently waiting for you as you ran up to them. They all looked at you in wonder. In all their years of knowing you, not once had you been late. Not even by a minute, but here you were, six minutes late desperately trying to catch your breath. 

"Uh, squad leader (f/n)?" You looked up at the owner of the voice. It was Bruce. 

"You do know that training started about six minutes ago, right?" He said, amusement clear in his voice. 

"Really?" You questioned.

He merely nodded, a small grin spread across his face.

"Then tell me why the fuck are you not running." You spat, clearly agitated. The grin quickly vanished from his face.

"I uhh, well-" he stuttered. 

"Get your asses moving!" You yelled. They all visibly flinched before sprinting away. When they were gone you sat down on the picnic table nearby. 'Wow, only 6 minutes after 12:00 and I'm already pissed. That has to be a new record.' You thought, trying your best to calm down. Leaning back you decided it would be best to close your eyes and relax a little. 

Just as you were finally feeling calm, you felt a presence in front of you. You cracked open an eye to see who had disturbed your relaxation time. It was none other than Levi himself. 

"Hanji was right, you do look like shit." He said before you could say anything. You frowned.

"Well hello to you too." You said, clearly annoyed.

"So what's your problem." He said flatly. The sudden question confused you.

"What do you mean?" You asked. He sighed, visibly annoyed.

"I mean is everything okay." He said, crossing his arms.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Why?" You were, to say the least, very confused as to why he was asking you if you were okay.

"Well first you didn't show up for breakfast, now I find you here, looking like you've just been dragged through hell." You frowned.

"Wow, you sure know how to compliment a lady." You retorted, your voice coated with sarcasm. 

"Just answer my damn question." He was getting impatient, his usually blank face was slightly scrunched up, making it obvious.

"I am completely fine, but even if I wasn't it would be none of your concern." You stated. Your patience was also running thin.

"Fine if you won't tell me I guess I will have to force it out of you." You looked at him, not sure of what he meant.

"Come to my office after dinner. If you do not there will be severe consequences." He then quickly turned and left you. 

'What the actual fuck.' Was all you thought, looking at his retreating form. Guess you had no choice. You would meet him after dinner, just like he asked. A few moments later your squad had returned, forcing you to focus on training and not the possibilities of tonight. Levi was unpredictable, all you could do was hope for the best

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Levi tsk tsk


	5. Useless Questions

The rest of the day lulled by with nothing overly exciting happening. Dinner came and went as usual and before you knew it, you were standing in front of the Corporals door. Sighing, you decided to just hurry and get whatever he had planned over with. You were very tired due to a lack of sleep and just wanted to go back to your room and get some shut eye. Raising your fist you knocked three times and waited.

"Come in." Levi called from behind the closed door. 

Entering the room closed the door and saluted. He waved his hand, dismissing you from your salute. "Lock the door." He said. You turned and clicked the lock into place. Now nobody could disturb you. "Sit down." He said, gesturing to one of the chairs positioned in front of his large desk. You sat down and waited for him to continue. 

For awhile he just sat at his desk and looked at you. After about five or so minutes he finally spoke. 

"So what was wrong with you today?" He questioned, yet still maintained his usual bored voice.

"Who said anything was wrong, sir." You said, a slight edge to your voice. You were growing quite impatient being asked the same question.

"Don't pull that shit with me." Levi said standing up. "Practically everyone at HQ knew something was wrong." 

He slowly waked over to you, arms crossed behind his back. He made his way behind your chair and placed his hands on your shoulders. Learning in close to your ear he spoke again. 

"So you can either be a good girl and tell me what's wrong, or you can have me force it out of you." His breath was hot against your ear. You swallowed before speaking. 

"Well, I never really was a good girl." 

Almost instantly he was in front of you, his lips captured yours in a rough kiss. He bit you bottom lip, asking for entrance, you denied and kept your mouth shut causing him to growl in annoyance. 

His arms snaked around your waist, pulling you up out of the chair. You gasped when you felt a strong hand grasp your bottom. Levi took advantage of your open mouth and slipped in his tongue. You both fought for dominance, but it was not long before you gave in and let Levi take control. 

"Good girl." He muttered under his breath, pulling at your harness buckles. He pulled at the harnesses like they were his worst enemy, until finally they dropped to the floor. He was about to undo your shirt buttons when you stopped him. He looked at you, confused and slightly annoyed. He let out a sudden gasp when he felt the palm of your hand rub his hardened member. 

'My turn.' You thought, grinning.

Levi leaned back and gripped the desk, biting his lip in a effort to suppress a moan. You slowly undid his belt and unzipped his pants. Slipping your hand in you started rubbing his member, which was already wet with pre-cum. You loved how his hips buckled into your hand, showing how needy he truly was. Just when you thought you had taken control, Levi grabbed your wrists and turned you around, pushing you roughly onto the desk. He began to kiss and nip at your neck, leaving bright red marks everywhere. When he found your sweet spot he started to suck on it, hard, leaving a large purple bruise behind.

'Well that's going to be a bother to cover up.' You thought, unaware of the hand that had slipped down between your legs. 

You let out a surprised yelp when you felt a hand press against your clothed womanhood. Even though your pants were blocking the way, it felt so good and you couldn't help but let out a small moan. This pushed Levi over the edge, in a second he had undone your pants and ripped them off. He then undid his own and pulled them off along with his boxers, leaving him naked from the waist down. He went on to remove his shirt, throwing it into an unknown corner. 

You let your eyes travel down his well toned body, loving what you saw. When your gaze reached his manhood, your eyes widened slightly. For a small man he sure wasn't lacking down there. 

"Like what you see." His voice was low and husky, coated with lust and the sound of it made you shiver. 

You nodded. Levi wasted no time removing your shirt, leaving you completely exposed to him. He slid his hands down your body antagonizing slow, making you squirm. Once his hand reached your slick core he wasted no time inserting a finger, making you moan with pleasure. He pushed in a second then a third, before you knew it you were almost at your climax. You could feel the knot in your stomach build and just as you were about to cum he removed his fingers. You let out a small whine which made him chuckle lightly. 

"Now now princess, we can't have you come before the real fun starts, can we?" He stepped back a bit, gripping his manhood. 

"Is this what you want?" His voice was taunting. 

"P-please, Levi." You chocked out. 

"Please what (f/n)? You have to tell me what it is you want." He was going to make you beg. 

"Please, fuck me." Your voice was barley above a whisper. 

He stepped forward and placed the tip of his cock at your entrance. 

"What was that? I couldn't quite hear you." You couldn't take it anymore. 

"I want you to fuck me until I can't walk straight!" You shouted, not caring if anyone heard you. 

Unable to contain himself any longer, Levi thrust into you, causing you to scream out in pain and ecstasy. He didn't wait for you to adjust, mercilessly pounding into you. The pain soon faded away and pleasure took over, clouding all your senses. Levi leaned down and started attacking your neck with bites and kisses again. The feeling was too overwhelming and you felt your end coming near. 

"Le-Levi, I c-can't." You said between breaths.

"M-me too." He breathed. His thrusts became erratic and uneven.

You couldn't hold back anymore. As you came your vision went white and you screamed out Levi's name. Feeling your walls tighten around his member, Levi came, chocking out your name. 

You both took awhile to come down from your highs, relishing the sensation. Levi leaned up and looked you in the eyes. He then did something you definitely did not expect. He leaned down and placed a small tender kiss on your lips. It shocked you, so you just stared at him wondering what on earth he was doing. Without a word he lifted you up off the desk and carried you to a room. 

It was too dark to tell where he had taken you, but when you felt yourself be lightly placed onto a soft mattress you knew it was his bedroom. He climbed in bed with you and pulled the sheets up. He turned and pulled you into his arms and placed his chin on the top of your head. You were far beyond confused at this point. The feeling wasn't bad though, in fact you enjoyed it. Deciding to go along with it, you placed your head on his chest and stated to drift off. The last thing you felt before falling asleep was a pair of warm lips placing a kiss on the top of your head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> smut smut smutty smut smut :D


	6. The Morning After

Rays of sunlight flitted through the window curtains dancing off your eyes lids, causing you to stir from your sleep. Your eyes slowly opened, slightly burning from the light. Sitting up, you looked around and took in your surroundings. This definitely was not your room. You sat and thought for a moment until you remembered last nights events. You were in Levi's room. You smirked at the memory. You were still reminiscing when you felt the bed shift beside you. 

You craned your neck slightly and looked down at Levis still sleeping form. He looked so peaceful. His usual stoic expression was softened, giving him a child like essence. Your eyes continued to travel down his face until your gaze landed on his lips. They were slightly parted, taking in small breaths. You felt a strange warmth in your chest and you suddenly got the urge to kiss those thin lips. Before you knew it you were leaning in, coming closer and closer to meeting your lips with his. Then your lips were on his, softly, barley touching, but still present. The warm feeling in your chest suddenly burst into an army of butterflies, attacking your entire body. You were scared of the feeling. It was unnatural to you, completely foreign. 

Your panic grew as you watched Levis closed eyes slowly flutter open. It took a few moments before his eyes opened completely. When they were fully opened he looked up at you, meeting your stare. His grey eyes pierced your (e/c) ones and you felt an unfamiliar warmth rise to your cheeks. You both looked at each other for a few more moments before Levi finally broke the silence.

"Did you kiss me?" You continued looking at him. 

"Yes." You said bluntly. The both of you were silent once again, neither knowing what to say. 

Not wanting to stay in the slightly awkward atmosphere, you started to get out of bed. You barley moved an inch before you felt a heavy weight come over you and settle itself between your legs. You looked up to see Levi above you, his arms trapped your sides and his chest rested on yours. 

"What the-" You were cut off by his lips capturing yours in a passionate kiss. 

You were stiff at first, but then quickly relaxed into the kiss. When he pulled away his expression had turned serious. You were about to say something when he quickly cut you off.

"What was the matter yesterday?" You groaned, annoyed at the fact that he was still pushing this subject.

"For the love of god Levi, I don't need to tell you." You tried to stay calm, but the annoyance in your voice came out a lot clearer than you had intended it to.

He let out a long sigh. "Your right. You don't have to tell me." 

Relief flooded your body, glad that he had given up. It wasn't long before he spoke again. "But, if you want to leave this bed then I suggest you do." He almost sounded cheery, like he was pleased with himself. 

"You can't do that." You said, squirming underneath him. 

"Ahh, but I can. You see, (f/n), you may be an extraordinary fighter but when it comes down to it, I'm better." You bit your tongue at his words. No matter how much you hated hearing it, you knew it was true. 

 

Letting out a sigh of defeat, you brought your arms up and wrapped them around his shoulders, burying you face in the crook of his neck. He seemed surprised at your actions.

"Fine, I'll tell you. Just get off me already you fat oaf." He shot you a glare before rolling off back to his side of the bed. 

He kept an arm wrapped around your waist, making sure you wouldn't try anything. He didn't say anything. He only looked at you, patiently waiting for you to start. You let out a long sigh before beginning. 

"Well, it's pretty simple actually. The other night ago, I had a nightmare. My first one in years. So I guess it shook me up a bit because it's been so long." He looked at you silently, concern filled his steel eyes.

"If you don't mind me asking, what was your nightmare about?" You should have seen that coming, it should have been obvious that he would want to know why a strong woman such as yourself was shaken up over a bad dream. You shut your eyes, not wanting to remember the horror, but you knew he would force it out of you anyways. You took a deep breath. 

 

"Many years ago, when I was about the age of ten, titans attacked my hometown. During all the destruction, my father got stuck under our house. Or at least what was left of it. He told my mother to leave him, to take me and run as far as she could. She knew she couldn't do anything, so she ran. When I looked back I saw a titan pick up my father and snap him clean in half before eating him. When me and my mother rounded a corner, we stopped to catch our breaths. How foolish. It wasn't long before the very same titan who ate my father appeared. When we tried to run again, my mother tripped. Before I could even react the titan had her in its hands. She begged me to run, but I could only watch in horror as it slid her into its mouth. I turned to run, but tripped over something. It was a dead solider. When I saw the titan approaching me I grabbed the soldiers blades. I managed to cut off its thumb, but it soon had me in its grasp. When it tried to swallow me, I stuck my blade at the back of its throat and began to thrash at it with the other. It wasn't long before I made an opening. I thrust myself out, I didn't care that I would fall to my death. I just knew that I didn't want to die in there. As I was falling someone grabbed me out of the air. I thanked them before passing out. Then I woke up." 

 

You hadn't realized it, but you had started crying. Levi looked at you in shock. He had never seen you cry before and he didn't like it one bit. It made him feel sick. 

"Stop it." 

You looked at him, confused. "What?"

His face was scrunched up into an unreadable expression. "Stop crying, now." 

Your eyes widened slightly as you brought a hand up to feel your damp face. You looked down, ashamed that you had started crying in front of your superior.

"I'm sorry." You muttered out, unable to look him in the eyes. He lightly grabbed your Chin and forced you to look at him. His gaze was soft and comforting.

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have forced you to tell me." You shook your head. 

"Don't apologize, it's not like you knew. You were only making sure I was okay, and I thank you for that. It feels kind of good to get it off my chest." You gave him a small smile. His eyes widened slightly. He had never, in all his years of knowing you, seen you smile. Not like that at least. He didn't know what to say, so instead he leaned down and placed a small kiss to your lips.

"You know, we should probably get up now. Breakfast is starting soon." You said, breaking the comfortable silence. "Yeah, your right." Levi agreed. Both of you got up and started getting ready. Once you were both done, the two of you headed to breakfast. Together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is here!


	7. Rising Tension

You and Levi walked to the mess hall in silence. You were still playing over this mornings events in your head. Levi wasn't acting like himself earlier. He was tender and caring. Even now that comforting aura was still there, despite his stoic expression. It was confusing and a little scary. After arriving at the mess hall the both of you went your separate ways to sit with your squads. You earned a few strange looks, but no one said anything.

"Squad leader (f/n)." 

You looked up to see Alice fidgeting in her seat. She appeared to be nervous. 

"What is it?" 

You questioned. She sat there with her hands in her lap, looking at her feet. "W-well, the thing is-" she was cut off by the messenger bursting through the door. "Commander Smith requests all squad leaders are to report to the meeting room at once!" He spoke in a loud clear voice, but it was forced. 

'Whats got his panties in a twist.' You thought, getting up to leave for the meeting room. You looked over to Levi, hoping for some kind of answer. When he met your gaze he simply shook his head, indicating that he had no idea to why you were all being summoned. This worried you. If Erwin didn't even inform Levi of anything it was defiantly not anything good.

 

You all entered the meeting room to find Erwin sitting at the end of the table with papers neatly placed all along the table and a large map directly in front of him. There were a few curious murmurs among the other as everyone sat down. Once everyone was seated Erwin cleared his throat, signalling everyone to be quiet. After a few moments of silence, Erwin spoke.

"As you all know the 57th expedition outside the walls is scheduled one month from now." Everyone looked at eachother, curious as to why he was bringing up known information. What he said next hit everyone hard. "Plans have changed and the expedition will now take place in three days." While everyone else's eyes were popping out of their heads, Erwin's face remained impassive.

You stood abruptly, catching everyone's attention, even the commanders. "Sir, with all due respect, that is just absolutely ridiculous." You said exasperatedly. Before Erwin could speak you cut in again. "I mean, the new recruits have been here barley a month! We can't just throw a sudden expedition on them like that!" You were slightly panicking while the commander remained as calm as ever.

"I understand your concern (f/n), but we have gained very important information and have decided to change the expedition date." Shit. He had used you first name, without your title. He was dead set on this and you knew nothing you said or did would change anything. You grit your teeth and sat back down in defeat. You could feel everyone's stare burning holes into your head, but you refused to look at anyone. Once Erwin finished going over the plan and all the preparations, you were all dismissed. You quickly stood and stomped out of the room back to the mess hall.

 

You were stomping your way back when you were grabbed suddenly and pushed roughly against the corridor wall. When you looked up you were met with angry steel eyes. "What the hell Levi!" You called out, struggling to remove yourself from his grip. It was no use, his grip was too strong.

All you did was struggle and yell at him to let go. This didn't go on long before you were silenced. "Shut up!" He yelled giving you a shake. You immediately froze. Never, in all your years of knowing him, have you ever heard him yell like that. Not even to the cadets. You looked at him with wide eyes, but remained silent. 

"What the hell were you thinking back there?" Levi said. You could tell he was trying to keep himself from yelling again, but his tone was still harsh. You drew in a deep breath and clenched your fists. "I was simply stating how fucking stupid it is to rush this expedition." You spat out, failing to keep your anger under control. "There still just kids for Christ sake! They shouldn't even be in the military!" Your whole body was shaking with pure rage. You had always hated the fact that such young kids could enlist at just twelve years old. "Some of them are still mentally recovering from Trost! How the hell are they going to cope whe-" 

Your furious rant was suddenly cut off when you felt a strong hand come in contact with you cheek. It hit you with such force that you lost your balance slightly. You were so shocked you just looked at Levi, mouth agape. He looked as equally as shocked as you. "(F/n), I didn't mean to-" Not wanting to listen to anything he had to say, you pushed him away and stormed off, tears stinging your eyes. Levi stood there, looking at his reddened hand. The realization of what he had just done hit him like a ton of bricks. He clenched his fist and muttered a few curses before quickly waking in the opposite direction.

 

Once you arrived at the mess hall you slammed open the doors and quickly headed back to your table to collect your dishes.

"Squad leader (f/n), what happened?!" Lissa exclaimed. She had quickly noticed the red imprint of a hand on your cheek. "Nothing." You growled. "Just had to deal with an asshole, that's all." You were about to leave to put your dishes away when Alice stopped you. 

"Wait! There's something really important I still need to tell you." You sighed in annoyance. "Whatever it is I am sure it can wait." You started to walk away when she stepped in front of you, forcing you to stop. You were about to snap when she spoke again, well more like yelled.

"I'm pregnant!" This loud statement earned the attention of everyone around. You swore your heart stopped for a moment. Everything had slowed down and you felt sick. You didn't notice your plate and teacup slip from your grasp. The plate simply clattered to the floor, but the tea cup smashed upon impact. Your dishes weren't the only things falling. Before you knew it dizziness had clouded your mind. The last thing you remembered was Alice reaching for you with tears in her eyes. She always had such pretty green eyes. Then everything was black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long! This is my last week of University so things have been super super crazy this last month or so! BUT IT'S SUMMER SO I'M FREE

**Author's Note:**

> My first story on here! I hope everyone enjoys it and chooses to stick along for the ride :)


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